Electric fan

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A lowly electric fan waiting to be turned on

The electric fan is one of the members of the family of appliances. It has been bought by many fat lazy people across the world who does not want to cool their body using ice and penguins because they complain that it is too tiring.

Origin[edit]

The electric fan was made by the Egyptians some hundred years ago. Don't be surprised about that because they were a hell of a lot smarter than anybody else in the world back in those times. They already secretly invented electricity even before dinosaurs existed. Once again, don't be surprised about that, either, because they tend to survive and adapt to different temperatures, weather, climate and predators (like the dinosaurs and the penguins).

Anyway, there was once a rich ruler, named Khufu (the same guy who built the Great Pyramid of Giza), in Egypt and he complained about how hot it was in their country. He ordered peasants to go to the North Pole via airplanes (and DON'T be surprised about that) to gather large glaciers. When they would go back, the glaciers would not make it. Not because of the heat and the melting but because the peasants were so stupid that they did not bring a bigger plane where the glaciers would actually fit in. But we could not completely blame them because big planes weren't invented yet back then. Why? Because the penguins ate most of the Egyptian engineers. (Back to the topic) Khufu was furious and mad and he grabbed a peasant and spun him across the sand. In that spinning motion, Khufu observed that the sand would scatter and spray everywhere. He saw wind. He then invented the Khufu Fan (which was later named as the Electric Fan). The early models were actually made of a huge circular steel and at the center of it is a penguin, which serves as an axle. Three peasants are placed around the penguin and they would spin, giving Khufu some nice cool wind (which often smelled like sweat and why do I keep talking about penguins?).

Modern use[edit]

Tons of people are buying these electric fans from all over the world. Modern uses include cooling the body, changing the tone of your voice, giving off wind, fly-fishing, sticking your tongue in the blades, circulating heat, drying royal icing, strengthening seedlings, drying clothes, drying drywall mud, drying paint, and cooling your computer.

Social behavior[edit]

Electric fans are known to have very close relationships with humans. They get along with us really well. Several people honestly admitted that they slept in their bed while hugging their electric fans. Some even tend to marry them. But NO KISSING. The blades might cut your lips and it will fall to the ground, kissing the dry, dusty, dirty, old cement instead. When people from all over the world were complaining about same-sex marriage, THIS was already happening.

There is one bad trait of Electric Fans though, they tend to get angry at plants. Studies showed that this happened because in Egypt,where they first originated, there are not many species of plants. Another thing is plants tend to claim that they produce oxygen for us to live. The Electric Fans are against this, though. They claim that they produce the oxygen for us, potato couches, to live. Scientists defended the Electric Fans' statement because they fear that they would stop operating and global warming would worsen.

What is Going On With Their Species?[edit]

Although its dominant cousin, the Air Conditioner, who is currently gaining popularity is taking all over the world, the humble electric fan still continues to exist. Its innocent sharp blades and its not-so-dangerous electrical wires prove one thing: Electric Fans are man's best friend. They do not plot anything dangerous. Or do they?