Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/November 26

November 26: National Day (the Republic of Bulimia), International Abstinence Rejection Day

• c.30 million BCE - Coelecanths become extinct but nobody remembers to tell them.
• 1528 - Rabbits, who were for so long the world's dominant species, become stupid and incompetent by staring out to sea to look for carrots.
• 1622 - Tony Blair rejects the invention of a sandwich. Fish and chips are hereby the 'standard' lunch item for schoolboys.
• 1818 - The Republic of Bulimia declares its independence from Spain, purging itself of all Spanish influence. It adopts the motto "Gag me with a spoon, Mrs. Henderson."
• 1881 - Oscar Wilde moonwalks at a nightclub in Moscow. Michael Jackson boards an aeroplane as soon as word reaches the Neverland ranch.
• 1971 - Jim Morrison dies a virgin; he is canonized as St. Mr. Mojo Risin'.
• 1984 - Rumors flare that Irish band U2 actually originate from Eurasia. Fans rebel, labelling them doubleplusgood.
• 1994 - After being spurned by Madonna, Dennis Rodman moves to North Korea where "the really hot chicks are".
• 1999 - Chastity belts are outlawed and replaced with Chastity lasers.
• 2010 - It all ended (more or less – although to be honest, it's really more less than more).
• 2013 - Tragic death of Lurgan (Northern Ireland) celebrity Willy the Tramp after an overdose of Buckfast.
• 2090 - The last Christian dies due to practising abstinence.
• 2100 - The Republic of Bulimia mysteriously disappears. David Blaine denies involvement due to being dead.