Robert Brightningburg's THE GAME

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“Most people think THE GAME is all about a child staring into space with a needle in his neck. I don't. The needles should belong to the entire family. I want families to play THE GAME together.”

~ Shigeru Miyamoto on "THE GAME"

Also known as Robert Brightningburg's friends friends dad's game or simply THE GAME!

THE GAME is a futuristic game console, supposedly 3-12 XBOX's high. It is the eighth wonder of the world and is one of the greatest enigmas in history. Scientists and historians alike have been researching THE GAME since its origins in 1932. If you have any information about the game, please share it here.

Could this be what "The Game" looks like?

Disclaimer[edit]

Note: All documentation within this page is protected under the Bill Clinton internet privacy law. However the facts enclosed in here are so secret that right now the Thought Police are trying to shut this webpage down. Support us by spreading the knowledge so that this secret shall never be lost.

Background[edit]

Robert first began to tell the story of "The Game" in 2005. Soon word of "The Game" spread like wildfire. However this was no ordinary game.

Matthew Harper & Friends[edit]

Although no one can confirm that Matthew Harper is real, most historians do not question his existence. However there is very little knowledge on this enigmatic boy. Matthew Harper currently resides in Southern California, while Matthew Harper's unnamed friend (the one whose dad supposedly invented "The Game") lives in Las Roberts, Nevada. Mr. Harper used to live in Las s, which is where he witnessed "The Game" in action. It is said that Matthew Harper still has scars on his neck from where the needle was plugged in. However, various attempts by Robert to contact Matthew Harper have been unsuccessful do to the secrecy of THE GAME. Robert suggests that Matthew may have already smuggled THE GAME into southern California, though no hard evidence supports this theory.

The System[edit]

The original console for "THE GAME"

Needle

"The Game" comes with a needle, which has to be "plugged in" to the back of the player's neck for "The Game" to operate correctly. "The Game" also requires virtual reality gloves and a helmet. It is a (near) painless procedure and because the needles were "Special" you didn't bleed when you stuck one into the back of your head. It had a special liquid like substance that was like morphine that was injected into your neck. It then cauterized the skin every time it went in. One wrong move and you would be paralyzed from the waist down. If you were really unlucky the needle would go into your vertebrae and kill you instantly.

Suction cups

For this reason they have created an alternative way to use it. There are suction cups that stick to the top of your head and show you VR. Unfortunately this is incredibly unreliable because of the fact that you have to wetting the suction cups and you have to be bald. It is a relatively bothersome procedure that absolutely no one knows how to make it work. Because of various fail-safes designed to keep it "CONFIDENTIAL!", no one, except for those who have operated "The Game", has actually seen live gameplay not even Robert.

Commercialization and THE GAME[edit]

The commercialization aspect of THE GAME didn't work all that well. The console wasn't allowed onto the market because of the needle and the fact that it would make all of the major video game companies bankrupt. Thus far THE GAME has been kept in the dark but one day it will be brought into the light. However various attempts by Robert to release the truth have failed due to missed deadlines in finding concrete evidence that THE GAME does indeed exist.

The actual THE GAME[edit]

THE GAME contains five levels so far:

Dino Jungle

You start as a rich man on a helicopter flying over an island when all of the sudden your helicopter crashes. You get out and you are in a jungle. The jungle is dangerous as it is filled by T-rexes and Velociraptors. You can attempt to fight off the T-rexes but it will ultimately be futile as you will end up losing all of your ammo if you try. The dinosaurs like to come out of hiding from plants and ambush you. The safe[er] place to be is the research facility which is free of T-rexes and has much less dinosaurs. However the crumbling research facility will come under siege at times. There are many weapons scattered around and you find a curious weapon which is like a tazer. On it are 4 main settings: stun, shock, electrocute and MEGA. The MEGA setting instantly fries dinosaurs and anything else and splatters it instantly. As you venture deeper and deeper into the base you meet some Dinosaur worshiping scientists. They are obviously insane but they are dangerous for a different reason. When they are close enough a flaming demon monkey bursts out of their stomach and rush towards you. Since the facility is full of these people you have to try and find a way out. You end up being tricked as you go down an elevator into hell to be greeted by a scientist who ends up transforming into the Devil. You fight your way through hell and away from the Devil and eventually end up at the surface.

Sea monster encounter

You end up in a dock and hurry towards a ship and start navigating away from Zoombie Island. You are constantly attacked by squids and giant whales on your long journey towards the mainland. Squids and killer fish try to knock you off the side of the cruise ship and occasional tourist zoombies are on there as well. After briefly getting hit over the boat a killer fish swallows you whole. When you are in there you have to create a fire so that the fish will open its mouth to let the smoke out. You get out of the fish and swim back to the ship and try to commandeer it. However with all of the squids and giant fishes hitting the ship (plus the tourist zoombies) you crash right into Zoombie Island.

Zoombie Island

You get out of the wrecked ship and run to a nearby mansion. However as you turn a corner you end up being overwhelmed with fear as you find ZOOMBIES!!! They are very dangerous and you have to fight them off and running away is not an option. However you can easily kill them by luring them off cliffs or into walls but many of them can catch you in an open area. The land is much more wide open then the jungle or the claustrophobic cruise ship but there are many broken down buildings, walls and former houses that impede your travel. Furthermore the zoombies can get around the island much easier than you can. There are also a certain amount of camps in the area and zoombies can be seen experimenting with the equipment. At a certain point they turn on a radio and cover their ears. This will allow you to escape them for a short while. You eventually escape and find a way onto the mainland. For more information on zoombies see the zoombie section.

Alien Level

As you arrive on the main land you discover that aliens have invaded planet earth and you are the only person who can stop them. In the first part you try and fit into the environment in a sort of stealth mission. After hiding for a certain time the Aliens find you and you get into a major confrontation. At this point you can use your special power which will enable you to wipe out many of the Aliens. The aliens are very hard to defeat and use ranged fighting primarily unlike the previous foes. When you have wiped the main alien forces out you will have to face the worst level of all...

Doom Level

You finally have reached the last level and the forces of evil from your previous levels have come to wreak havoc on planet earth. You use a hud and have all the weapons at your disposal in this level. You are the only person who can stop them and there is no room for failure. Expect a really hard indoor level with hundreds of units onscreen at once.

Enemies[edit]

There are many enemies in THE GAME and they are all incredibly dangerous and sport unique tactics. Below you can read about their tactics. A list of all of the enemies include:


  • T-rexes
  • Velociraptors
  • Dinosaur worshippers
  • Flaming demon monkeys
  • Zoombies
  • Squid
  • Killer fish
  • Aliens
  • Monsters (researching)

Dinosaur worshippers These are the scientists of the original research facility on the Dinosaur jungle. Since the research base was overrun with the dinosaurs the majority of the scientists have worshipped them. These dinosaur worshippers are fairly weak as individuals but they are more importantly the carriers of Flaming Demon Monkeys that take residence in their stomach. They usually travel in groups as they praise the dinosaurs but they are very easy to spot because of their loud rituals. They are fairly easy to take down as long as you aim for the stomach as to take down the Flaming Demon Monkey as well.

T-rexes

These are pretty self-explanatory. These are the biggest dinosaurs in "THE GAME". They are vicious and are really big and they will tear you apart with their teeth if they find you. These dinosaurs can swallow you if you are lucky and then you will go out the backside and be "invisible" to velociraptors. These dinosaurs take a lot of ammo to go down and they are much faster than you.

Velociraptors The velociraptors are one of the most rampant creatures in "THE GAME" (second to zoombies). They take a moderately low amount of firepower to take down and can possibly be punched by the reality gloves. However the flip side is that they are incredibly fast, do a lot of damage and utilize pack tactics that could only be made possible by THE GAME. They usually are under the cover of the jungle so you will rarely be given a good shot at them from a far away distance. The good thing is that if you happen to get swallowed by a T-rex instead of torn apart raptors will run away from you. In CQB they will use their jaws and rapid claw attacks that will tear you apart in seconds. They also have the possibility to disable you and start eating you alive (with real pain sensation made only possible by THE GAME). While it is possible to punch the velociraptor it would be much more practical to just shoot it like a horse.

Flaming Demon Monkeys

A Flaming Demon Monkey attacking a helpless scientist.

These monkeys burst out of a Dinosaur worshipping scientist’s stomach. They have several attacks such as a frenzied swing with their arms or setting someone on fire with a flaming feces attack. Attacking from a distance of over twenty yard is advised because of the inaccuracy of their feces and the damage of the frenzied attacks. Be aware as they may swing from trees and are very fast and maneuverable. When fighting more than one of them backpedalling and shooting is advised as they will ambush and kill you if you try to run away. If for some reason you engage in CQC with more than one of them you will almost certainly be killed by them.

Satan

The depiction of the Devil in "THE GAME"

Although he isn't a real enemy and is only found once he is the devil so he was put in here. Satan is invincible and impossible to fight. He is found on the dinosaur level and is first portrayed as a greeting scientist who then turns into the devil. He will kill you instantly by setting you aflame if you stay still. You cannot inflict damage upon him and your only hope is to run away.

Squid

The squid are only seen on the sea level. They are very dangerous because of their tentacles and beak and they tend to travel in large groups. However their real danger is if they pull you into the water. Then the squids will swarm and easily kill you or you may get swallowed by a killer fish.

Killer Fish

This type of fish is approximately the size of a large whale shark but it is carnivorous. It has no teeth but it will swallow you whole and possibly drown you. Your only hope of defeating it is by starting a fire inside of its stomach and hoping that it will try to surface and release you. Several times on the cruise ship these killer fish can be seen slamming into the boat trying to knock you over the edge.

Zoombies

A black and white photo of zoombies before brutally killing several workers in an early outbreak in the Detroit slums.

The infamous zoombies are the strangest and most dangerous creatures in this world. They can be found on the Cruise Ship, Zoombie Island and in another form in the Final Fight. They are incredibly dangerous adversaries that would most likely be on the upper hand in a one on one fight. Considering their strength and amazing speed the chance of surviving a zoombie outbreak would be minimal. Thus far no major zoombie outbreaks have occurred in the last thirty thanks to wide range deployment of radios which zoombies happen to fear. However the threat of zoombies loom in the distance and a major outbreak could very well end the world as we know it.

Zoombie groups

There are many different types of zoombies in THE GAME. All of which have different attributes and strengths but they all share the same type of movement. There are five types so far.

Cruise ship zoombies: Dumbed down same zoombie Island zoombies with different skins. These are the first zoombies in THE GAME so they are naturally the weakest and slowest. There aren't many of these on the cruise ship level as they will easily fall off the sides of boats. They usually wear a sailors uniform or a tourist outfit of some kind.

Zoombie Island zoombies: These are very dangerous zoombies. These zoombies are strong, very fast and they know how to use tools somewhat. They are rampant around the island and can sense you within a ten mile radius presuming that there are other zoombies communicating within the area. They presumably wear military or civilian clothes.

Teleporting zoombies: These zoombies are the minority on Zoombie Island. These zoombies aren't reported to look any different but they have the added ability to teleport. This allows them to conserve their running speed and easily tackle and kill humans.

Doom Zoombies or "Doombies": Not much are known about Doombies at this moment. Stay tuned for further information.

Suicidal Zoombies: These zoombies are on the lower intelligence of the zoombie hierarchy. If they find grenades on the ground, they will play with them, and inadvertently pull the pin, blowing themselves up.

Formulas on Zoombie movement

After the process of "zoombification" they receive many of the advantages of a regular zombie with some notable additions. They can sense an individual person from up to ten miles away and that the farther away they are from you the faster they will travel. Using the Free Mason theory of Zoombified movement first invented in the 1950s you can find the temporary speed per half-mile.

D x Z = tS

Z= Zoombie rate of travel (17.5 per half mile)

D = distance away from zoombie (in half miles)

tS= Temporary Speed that the zoombies run at (in MPH)


Using this formula a zoombie that is 2 miles away from you would run at approximately 75 miles per hour.

4 x 17.5 = 75mph


To get the final speed of zombies as they reach you the new Matt Harper theory of distributed zoombified momentum that will eventually kick in at the final quarter of a mile. There is also the fact that zoombies continue one second before changing speeds at every half of a mile (aka lame duck seconds). You should be able to find the final zoombified speed upon the time of arrival by using this following formula:

Ms + wS = Fs


Ms = Minimal speed (always around 4 MPH)

wS= Withheld seconds: Lame duck seconds accumulated before the final quarter of a mile multiplied by 5 (the amount of speed eventually saved by the lame duck seconds)

fS = Final speed upon arrival (in MPH)


Using our two mile example we should get the following result:

4 + 15 = 19

However taking into account that certain zoombies can teleport the final speed may increase or decrease within a margin of 15 mph (respectively based on the experience of the zoombie and the terrain of the area).

This being said zoombies are probably the most unpredictable enemy in modern combat and are a force worth reckoning.

The Various Characters of THE GAME[edit]

The Ninjitsu Master

He is probably the stealthiest character of them all. He can hardly be heard when he walks is also very agile. He is said to have been able to put a two inch indent into steel, with his pinky and to have levitation abilities. Of his attacks he can thrust at you with an open palm technique, choke with one or two hands, can kick towards the face and is self taught in the arts of staff fighting. His two special abilities include his pinky of iron which can put a two inch indent into a steel wall and his levitation abilities which can send him flying. Few have met the ninjitsu master and have survived to tell the tale.

Attacks: Rapid hand thrusts, Choking, kicking and also staff fighting.

Mobility: Very, very fast and can climb just about any surface.

Appearance:Wears a ninja suit and often carries throwing knives or a staff.

Special abilities: Pinky thrust and levitation abilities through meditation.

The Bodyguard

He is seen in the helicopter crash at the beginning and is one of the most powerful characters. He takes a lot of damage though because of his bullet proof vest and C4 he is very unmanuverable and easy to spot. However this is more than made up by his resistance to pain and the fact that he has many of the powerful guns available to him in the beginning of THE GAME. He is the best at using guns in the game and he can explode himself and many other enemies around him with the C4 he keeps around his waist. Nobody really knows how effective a strategy this is since you will have to wait 30 minutes to respawn.

Attacks: Guns, grenades, heavy weapons.

Appearance: Wearing urban BDU's, gasmask, a bulletproof vest and a kevlar helmet.

Mobility: Fairly slow and clunky thanks to the armor he wears.

Special abilities: Is very resistant to pain and can blow himself up.

The Pirate

Also known as the rich guy. He is known for his excellent knife and sword fighting. He was in the helicopter at the beginning when it went down. He is known for his knife and sabre fighting though his gun fighting is fairly poor. He can't take very much damage though this is offset by the fact that like the ninja all his moves are silent. Unlike the ninja he is not nearly as well disguised and can be easily spotted. Fortunately his predominately melee weapons and throwing knives ensure that he will never have to scout for ammunition. His special attack is known for getting him into a manic frenzy and killing just about anyone he sees (even allies)

Attacks: Sword thrust, knife throwing and knife stabbing

Appearance: Pirate outfit and other various expensive looking outfits.

Mobility: Nimble with his feet and fairly agile.

Special abilities: Takes out a huge amount of knives and throws them at anything and everything that is alive.


The kid who can summon a robot that is not (but looks like) Optimus Prime

This is an annoying kid that has nothing going for him but the robot that follows him around. He's not really all that special by himself but his robot sure kicks ass. On foot he can do little more than walk around and try to use pistols and some environmental melee weapons like pipes and other things but it is clear that this boy won't be good for anything. However controlling the robot is very rewarding from the tedious on foot sections.


Attacks: Pistols, melee weapons and punches

Mobility: Incapable of running for more than 15 seconds.

Appearance: Polo shirt, pants, glasses and potentially crocs (if they don't get lost).

Special abilities: Robot that looks like but isn't Optimus Prime


The robot that is not (but looks like) Optimus Prime The robot is the single most destructive force in the entire game. The robot controls like a character and uses punches, stepping on smaller objects, firing missles and shooting lasers. The robot will destroy any opposition very quickly and effectively though creates an immense amount of collateral damage along the way.


Attacks: Missles, heavy machine guns, punches, squishing with feet and lasers.

Mobility: Fairly manueverable with jetpacks and can cross long distances

Appearance: Like Optimus Prime except with different colors.

Special abilities: Something along the lines of a mini-nuke.