Talk:Basement-dweller

		This article was nominated for deletion on October 28, 2009. The result of the discussion was Keep.

Life at Ground Level

While some recent studies may be suggesting that basement-dwellers may have evolved from Humans, it is beyond a doubt that their relation is very distant. However, some humans—often parents—have been inclined to attempt to bring a basement-dweller aboveground, which can be very dangerous to the basement-dweller's health (and the wellbeing of everyone around them). For this reason, it is crucial to be aware of the key differences between the two species.

Basement-dwellers tend to be viewed as very clumsy aboveground; in addition to a lack of coordination in general, the bright daylight may be extremely disorienting. It should also be noted that their field of vision is a rectangle roughly the size of a computer screen, allowing them very little peripheral vision.

A basement-dweller has linguistic skills resembling that of the typical ogre. This is very important to be aware of, as the use of excessive verbal speech around them may cause them to become confused and frustrated, leading to a possible attack. While basement-dwellers are neither strong nor coordinated, the layer of fat usually accumulated from their diet of pizza and Coke quite often makes them dangerous fighters if they can manage to land a blow. Provocation should be avoided by communicating instead via written text. (Depending on the individual's native language, this may require English, txt spk, lolspeak, 1337 5p34k, or any other dialect.)

Of course, the basement-dweller's intelligence should not be underestimated. While the average IQ is considerably lower than that of a human, it should be noted that humans are incredibly stupid as well, and the difference is not as great as it might seem. Basement-dwellers can be found in great numbers on the Internet, where the literacy rate is at least as high as it is among humans. It is entirely possible to carry on a conversation with a basement-dweller over the interwebz, as long as you are fluent in at least one of the above languages. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by PartTimeTroll (talk • contribs)

This should be incorporated into the article itself. Well written.                                • Puppy's talk page • 03:11 30 Mar 2013

Study of the basement-dweller as a subspecies is a creative idea. But the article itself is about the basement-dweller as a social phenomenon (especially, as a shocking realization of his parents' anti-establishment tendencies!) and I don't see a good place to fit into it a "scientific paper." Instead, I've put a pared-down edition at the new Basement-dweller (species). Spıke Ѧ 11:22 30-Mar-13