Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/March 21

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March 21: Vernal Equinox (usually)

  • 1627 BCE - Babylonian chief astronomer Ernest is informed that his assistant Vern has calculated today as the equinox. Ernest takes all the credit and names the event as "Day of Equal Lengths of Night and Day With No Connection to Vern Whatsoever". Historians would later correct this injustice.
  • 5 CE - The first recorded instance of the question "What Would Jesus Do?" occurs when his mother asks what he wants for breakfast.
  • 1804 - The Napoleonic code is adopted as law in France, although nobody could read it, being in code, duh.
  • 1890 - Oscar Wilde pens his novel The Picture of Dorian Gray in the vicinity of one of his favorite sources of inspiration, a kitchen sink.
  • 1919 - The Treaty of Versailles is dictated to several secretaries, ending World War I. One of them is a German spy and covertly adds a clause mandating a sequel.
  • 1931 - The electric guitar is introduced, resulting in the genre of rock 'n' roll being born, enjoying its peak during the Great Depression.
  • 1943 - In the last recorded mounted cavalry charge, soldiers on horseback from Austria-Hungary charge a battalion of Russian tanks and succeed in destroying 80% of them using only their broadswords and ceremonial poofy hats.
  • 1993 - The first video is uploaded on the internet: a skin flute performance.
  • 2015 - Several massive icebergs break off Antartica in an attempt to counter global warming. Climatologists all do a facepalm while the rest of the world think it to be a great idea. People in Florida throw icecubes into the ocean in solidarity.