Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/November 13

November 13: Quack Like a Duck Day, Feast of Hermaphrodite

• 10,000 BCE - Humans begin destroying the forest, driving out bears and things.
• 7,573 BCE - Hermes and Aphrodite have a lovely bouncing boy, Hermaphroditus. This proves problematic when he falls out of his crib.
• 7,558BCE - Hermaphroditus gets into a swimming pool with Salmacis, and 2 becomes 1.
• 1 BCE - New way of counting up instead of down, ADD, proposed, but no one finishes project off.
• 832 - Saint Anselm is permabanned from the Vatican for setting fire to the Pope.
• 1915 - French Army phases out custard pies as infantry weapons, replaces them with hand-buzzers.
• 1932 - William Butler Yeats marries his dog Chico.
• 1972 - Mediocre Britain votes on whether to join the European Community. Turnout is low, "yes" carries the day with a result of 6-4.
• 1978 - While starring in an open air production of Shakespeare's Henry V, Sir John Gielgud is carried off by a hunting kingfisher. He is found unharmed some hours later, having tricked the bird into incubating his egg-like head.
• 1992 - The title of world's first penguin to eat rocks is taken by Magiwatoo, a penguin from Chilean waters.
• 1990 - The first webcomic is launched, entitled Two Sarcastic Badgers and Some Clipart.
• 2009 - It is officially announced that the language of Liverpool is Quack. Every Liverpudlian goes quackin crazy.
• 2015 - The French get tired of rioting, someone quacks for comedic value, rioting ensues.
• 2063 - Jacob von Hogflume, inventor of Time travel, is born in a log cabin in 1864.