User:Oliphaunte/Q&A Department

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An example of a good Q&A
An example of a better Q&A

Welcome to the Q&A Department for Unsignpost, Uncyclopedia, and Other Highly Respectable Institutes

Read First

Please be courteous when leaving a question, A.K.A. No profanity (Hah, yea right), no insults (unless you say them with a smile), no degrading someone else (unless it's yourself), and most of all, please just have some respect when writing the question (Really. No joke. Be respectful).

If you are unsure if you're question is ok, just leave and if it is deemed unusable, then trust me, we'll let you know. If it's good, expect on the next edition of Unsignpost and if the New York Times ever responds to my phone calls, they might even go there too.

If you would like to know how you can help out, leave a message here and he will get back to you fast eventually.

Leave Questions Below this Line

  • Do you like cows? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 17:58, 3 December 2011
  • I'm in a homosexual relationship with my cousin and I'm worried that my family and friends will find out. That's half the problem as I've a anger problem at my girlfriend who I blame for making me apparently impotent and some violence has taken place between us. Thankfully it's nothing too serious, just some good hearted vicarious punishment for my frustrated sexuality. The truth is I don't enjoy sex with her and I'm racked with terrible feelings of guilt for the casual sex with my cousin. Now I'm eyeing up quite few animals on the farm (sexually) and I'm wondering whether to let them both down gently, or continue with my covert sexual operations. Also I have a child with my sister which I keep in a shed. It's not really like a human being as I have never let it see the outside world and keep it company with my dogs. Do you have any ideas on how to get me out of this mess?--Sycamore (Talk) 21:24, December 3, 2011 (UTC)
  • How do I ask a question here? --Wanna see a magic trick? 02:08, December 8, 2011 (UTC)
  • Have you answered all of the questions on this page? -RAHB 05:30, February 10, 2012 (UTC)

Leave Comments or Complaints Below this Line

  • I'd like to complain about the state of affairs in this hotel's tea room. The smell is unbearable in here. There's too much light let in from outside, and at night the place is too fecking dark to see whether or not I'm drinking green or black tea. This is very important as I have a theaflavin-3-gallate deficiency that flares up only at 9 o'clock in the morning. You'd this would be okay because that early in the morning I'd be able to see the tea, but the problem lies in the fact that if I have any more tea than fills the deficiency within a 24-hour period, I experience very inconvenient seizures and the temporary loss of ability to control my sexual urges, effectively leaving me twitching around on the ground while repeatedly thrusting my groin into the air, making grunting noises. But I digress. There's a dumpster next to the tea table and it attracts a great deal of local bird-life. All the unpleasant kinds, seagulls, pelicans, crows, what have you. Couldn't attract a nice spotted purple martin, noooooooo. It has to be the disgusting birds attracted to trash. Idiotic. At any rate, in retrospect it doesn't look like this is the tea room at all. I seem to have fallen down the trash chute by accident this morning. Cheerio! -RAHB 00:09, February 11, 2012 (UTC)
We're glad you enjoyed your stay at the Bates Motel. We hope you choose to stay with us during next year's uncyclopedia Q&A convention. --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)  Georgia-flag-on-soccer-ball-vector.jpg 01:57, February 13, 2012 (UTC)