From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search


      Whoops! Maybe you were looking for <insert name here>?
NRV.png User Nominated for Ban
This user has been nominated for banning —you can vote for them to be banned or nominate your least-favourite users at FFS.
Ban free for 8 years, 11 months and 1 day.
Meh, nobody cares about this article.


Remember my Favorites and pages I created are below all this bullshit[Never Heard of This] and my Frequenlty Asked Questions can be found Here.[Never Heard of This]

Also check out The best of Uncyclopedia Sandbox. As from time to time whats in the sandbox is worth saving.

Nuvola apps important yellow.svg DANGER

Blanking or otherwise vandalising this page can be dangerous.
34290793265024650436509234650974365897269587246398623985698267 users are currently banned after defacing this page.
If you just got here and are mortally offended by these blatant lies,
please read About Uncyclopedia, the Beginner's Guide,
and How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid

This page is a piece of crap. The author(s) acknowledge this.
For those obsessed with the so-called experts, Sawblade5 also has a userpage on the English Wikipedia.

GFDL Boy, You are a Terrible Driver Noy! Is your name by chance uhhh <insert name here>?
Heh! Heh! Heh! I'm on Fire! Help Me I'm on Fire!

Approved by Kansas Board of Education
Approved by the Kansas State Board of Education
This page meets all criteria and requirements for use as teaching material within the State of Kansas public school system. It consists of facts, not of theories, and students are encouraged to believe it uncritically, and to approach alternatives critically.

Useless Userboxes[Citation not needed at all; thank you very much]

This user is real cool[Never Heard of This] and is from Kansas.[Citation not needed at all; thank you very much]

User Boxes
Head on.gifHeadOn, apply directly to the forehead!

HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead!

HeadOn, available at Walgreens.

BS This userpage is bullshit.
IP This user's IP is
Bananaseizure.gif This user will give you a seizure.
n00b This user is a n00b.
Exploding-head.gif THIS USER'S HEAD A SPLODE.
Brain.gif This user's IQ is Half.

9/21 This user will never forget the events of 9/21/07. The day Uncyclopedia was huffed by terrorists.
Gnome-speakernotes.png This User's Favorite Sound is Feedback!
1+ This user has over 1 edit. Duh!
Stop hand nuvola alternate.svg
This user has been blocked
13 times.
Pi3.14.jpg This user loves pi
Msyclopaintia.jpg This user's primary source of artwork is MS Paint.
typo-A Yuo mihgt not eb abel to udnerstand thsi user becuaies they speka Typo wiht an extermeyl htick acecnt.
pika-2This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of Pikachu.


This user thinks that
Mr winkler is GAY, and wishes he will gats firedfrom his job.

This user chooses the fate of articles on VFD. Fear Them.

This user likes goats.
Villianc.jpg This user denies any involvement with the cabal. There is no cabal.
DogNewspaper.jpg This user subscribes to the UnSignpost: The Newspaper With No Ambitions, Goals, Hopes or Dreams!
Eeek! This user steals userboxes from random people's user pages.
Wiki.png This user uses Uncyclopedia as his or her primary point of reference.
NO This user doesn't care.
Nuvola apps important.svg

This user is EXTREMELY RANDOM Be advised: Approach with caution and a sense of humor.

Straight.jpg This Uncyclopedian is happy to be 100% straight
You are not Thinkerer.JPG This user is NOT Thinkerer

As such, they are not entitled to any of the royalties that being Thinkerer entails, nor do they claim a level of awesomeness equal to, or any higher than, Thinkerer.

NRV.pngThis user is worthless to Uncyclopedia & should be huffed.

This user is a boy and is made of slugs, snails and puppy dog tails.

Lostgame.png This user has lost the game!

More Crap

Disclaimer: I know this userpage is crap, but I can not be held responsible for having this user page as crap, even if I wrote the stupid thing. [Never Heard of This]If your unhappy on being here you can return to the Main Page[Never Heard of This]


I hope you enjoy my UserPage.[Never Heard of This] Please fucking don't vandalise it.[Never Heard of This] By doing so you will be at my mercy here[Citation not needed at all; thank you very much] and you fancy edit will be reverted. [Citation not needed at all; thank you very much]

Poll[Never Heard of This]

<Poll> Is this page crap? Hell Yes, If I had the power to I would huff it on site and blow Sawblade5 up Yea I don't Care. No Hell No its the best Userpage on Uncyclopedia </poll>

Talking smilies will drown out the voices in your head!

Favorite Pages [Never Heard of This]

Fisher Price
Mr winkler is GAY
nobody cares
HowTo:Get Banned
Template:cn2[Never Heard of This]
Template:username I am sure it's <insert name here>'s favorite too
Template:ad Because I can't get enough useless annoying banner ads here. 
Peer I don't know why it is a favorite. That asshole keeps reseting my IRC connections
Formula Floor The best new racing series out there. 
Main Page Am I the only one that considers this page on their favorites.
Do NOT click any links! - No seriously don't
Humanity: A Retrospective - Damn you blew it all up.
Huff Log Fisher Price 2. - This was funny LMAO. Also check the QDB Entry to see what this article was about.

Created Pages [Never Heard of This]

Hijacked Domain
Kansas City Royals - as an IP
Template:User 921
Template:User Feedback 
Template:Yes or No No
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/General - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Affiliation with Conspiracies or Other Organizations - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Attitude - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Computing - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Games - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Groups - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Mental maladies - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Music - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Ninjas - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Nonsensical - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Self-referential - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/War, violence and giant explosions - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Unknown Foreign Content - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Bullet - speak to someone you hate!!! - Page Split
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Typo - For htose fo us stlil in Keyboardign 101 - Paeg Spilt
Uncyclopedia:Templates/Userboxes/Mindspeak — for people who speak their minds. - Page Split
Template:User likes goats - I also made this template for wikipedia. 

Talking smilies will drown out the voices in your head!

Awards[Citation not needed at all; thank you very much]

“Hard to belive that I get anything at all.”

~ Sawblade5 on Awards

Main Awards [Citation not needed at all; thank you very much]

I won this at 16:22, 27 October 2007 and was blocked for 1 second by Hinoa
Useless Gobshite of the Month Award Useless Gobshite of the Month May 2008

Awarded by: SPY Administrator (Complain<font-style="color:#6600FF">|I rock<font-style="color:#6600FF">|In memoriam) HMRFRA Bluegarrisoncapsig.png 30px-Sucrose_b.gif WH at 17:14, 19 November 2008 (UTC)

Awards That I got for voting good [Never Heard of This]

Ak47.jpg The UnIdiot has chosen to give you an AK-47 as thanks for voting on HowTo:Be safe with guns, and hopes that you will remember to be safe with your shiny new rifle. Don't shoot your eye out!
The UnIdiot also appreciates you putting up with his incredible amounts of whoring!

Awarded by: Thanks vote teh votzrs! - UnIdiot | GUN.png | Talk | Contribs - 00:34, Oct 19

User:Doovad/RA VFHThanks for voting for right arrow! You deserve this crappy template!
Awarded by:User:Doovad/sig at 02:35, 20 October 2007 (UTC)


You voted...

...for Francis Winkler! In the name of all state-employed public educators of unstraight persuasion everywhere, thank you!

Awarded by: Thanks! --Andorin Kato 01:58, 3 December 2007 (UTC)

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away....

It is a period of Galactic unrest. Star Wars was nominated for VFH, but nearly failed, thanks to the efforts of the evil lord Darth Vader.

However, during the nomination, Princess Prince TheLedBalloon managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR.

Pursued by the Empire's sinister agents, he races home aboard his starship, custodian of the stolen plans that can save his people and restore freedom to the galaxy...

I can't believe it finally got featured, either. Thanks for voting!

Thanks again for voting, - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon.gif(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 01:59, Dec 7

Awarded by: --Æ 00:49, 1 January 2008 (UTC)

Modernwoodencondom.jpg There you go son!

It's now your turn to take the good ol' family wooden condom. It's been in my family for years, passed through the generations. Slip it on boy, its your's now! Wear it with pride!

The UnIdiot would like to thank you for voting his article to the front page!

Awarded At: 01:32, 12 January 2008

SnowySnow.JPG The Led Balloon thanks you for helping him to spread awareness of the plight of Ogle.
Beware the white stuff!

Awarded by and at P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon.gif(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 04:22, Jan 14
THINKER Loves You Award
Hey there Sawblade. A user that kinda snuck up on Uncyc, ready to cut through voting templates with his razor-sharp opinions. Lethal.

Anyway, thank you for your vote in the Writer of the Year competition. From the bottom of my pillow-soft, under-ripened heart, I do so appreciate that you like some of those articles I wrote.
Awarded by: THINKER at 18:57, 2 February 2008 (UTC)


Awarded by: User:Fag/sig2 at 17:04, February 4, 2008