User talk:Ayumu Nishizawa

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia[edit]

Spike is a grumpy old dog. You can stroke his fur, or you can be smitten by his stick. It is up to you.

Hello, Ayumu Nishizawa, and welcome to Uncyclopedia. This is a wiki (a collection of pages anyone can edit). Words in blue are "links" and can be clicked to take you to another page. This wiki is for comedy. It pretends it's Wikipedia, but we make people laugh, not bore them. If you aren't interested in a fake encyclopedia but in writing fake news stories, we have UnNews, and there are other projects for scripts, lyrics, how-to guides, and so on.

What you can do

You can create your own article. For starters, create it under your own name; for example, User:Ayumu Nishizawa/Bedbug. (The red instead of blue is a link to a page that doesn't yet exist.) We have a list of articles that need to be created. You can help without writing articles; just read articles and, if you see an improvement in writing or in comedy, jump in and edit it. In fact, you can help without writing at all, such as organizing, watching for vandals, or even greeting other new users.

What you need

To write articles, you need a sense of humor and an ability to write good English. We all have strengths and weaknesses and you can get help in any area. But everyone needs an ability to work with other people. Be polite, positive, and helpful toward others, and assume others are doing the same toward you.

What to read

Here are some pages that might help you:

For personal help
  • The administrators are willing to help you, and several Uncyclopedians are willing to adopt you.
  • I will watch this page for a while and will know if you edit it. Afterward, you can contact me on my own talk page.
  • If you've written an article, we have a Proofreading service where someone will correct your mistakes, and a review process where an experienced Uncyclopedian will read your article and suggest improvements.
How to post to talk pages

Please follow these general rules:

  • Add comments at the end of a talk page so people notice them.
  • Start your paragraphs with one or more : characters to indent them and set them off from other people's posts.
  • At the end, type ~~~~ (four tildes), which gets replaced by your user name and the current date and time.
  • Don't delete anyone's messages. In case of any controversy, we depend on an accurate record of what was written. You may disavow your remarks by striking them through like this.

I hope you enjoy it here and write a lot of funny stuff! Spıke Ѧ 01:45 13-Nov-13

PS--The English on your user page is pretty good. The only thing to work on is where sentences begin and end (but we have a British guy who makes the same mistake)! If you write an article, you can get help with this at the Proofreading Service. Spıke Ѧ 01:53 13-Nov-13

PPS--You might want to say Hi to Leda Bort, another new user who is doing a lot of experimenting but hasn't yet started writing funny articles! Spıke Ѧ 20:05 13-Nov-13

Rat[edit]

Good work adding categories today! On Rat, I moved your new photo to the start of the article (which had no photo) and changed the caption. Spıke Ѧ 18:29 15-Nov-13

Likewise on Coffee dinosaur. Images should by typed on a line by themselves, at the start of a paragraph. You inserted this one in the middle of a paragraph — in the middle of a link! Please press Preview to see how your edit looks before pressing Save. (At that point you can continue editing, and only save when you get to a major stopping point.) Spıke Ѧ 20:42 15-Nov-13

Categories[edit]

It has been nice of you to pay attention to the categories of the articles. However, categories exist to help us find stuff. Occasionally an anonymous user will use categories to make a point (such as adding a politician he doesn't like to Category:Stupid or Category:Evil) or to tell a joke. This is not comedy with pen and pencil but comedy by rubber-stamp! We have a lot of categories that will never help anyone find anything, such as "Category:Things George Bush doesn't care about" and I hope these will eventually go away — likewise the categories with absurdly long names — and that we will tell jokes in the text of the article. I recently reverted you when you included an article about a vehicle in "Things that will kill you" and I see that ScottPat has undone another of your edits, and I agree with him that the letter Q ought not be included in, among other things, Category:Assholes. Spıke Ѧ 00:50 24-Nov-13

Autism[edit]

Regretfully, I must revert your insertion of the symptoms chart, because (1) it is too small to be seen properly on the page, and (2) I am not sure if it is your original work or not. The addition of the "Minecraft" symptom is a nice touch, if it is something you did. But if it is something that someone else did that you copied here, please keep in mind that we strive for *original* comedy creations here, not copies of funny stuff found elsewhere on the internet. If it is your work, there ought to be a couple other contrived symptoms in there if possible, something that might apply to as many people as possible, so as to fit in with the tone of the section describing autism as overdiagnosed, and the size of the picture on the page can be fixed, so let me know. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:36, December 3, 2013 (UTC)

Gang[edit]

I am sorry to have reverted your edit, but it's not clear who these guys are, and adding a photo of your local gang should be done on Facebook, not here; otherwise, there are many articles that people will try to convert into personal photo albums. Spıke Ѧ 22:38 12-Dec-13