User talk:Snarglefoop

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia[edit]

Spike is a grumpy old dog. You can stroke his fur, or you can be smitten by his stick. It is up to you.

Hello, Snarglefoop, and welcome to Uncyclopedia. This is a wiki (a collection of pages anyone can edit). Words in blue are "links" and can be clicked to take you to another page. This wiki is for comedy. It pretends it's Wikipedia, but we make people laugh, not bore them. If you aren't interested in a fake encyclopedia but in writing fake news stories, we have UnNews, and there are other projects for scripts, lyrics, how-to guides, and so on.

You can create your own article. For starters, create it under your own name; for example, User:Snarglefoop/Bedbug. (The red instead of blue is a link to a page that doesn't yet exist.) We have a list of articles that need to be created. You can help without writing articles; just read articles and, if you see an improvement in writing or in comedy, jump in and edit it. In fact, you can help without writing at all, such as organizing, watching for vandals, or even greeting other new users.

To write articles, you need a sense of humor and an ability to write good English. We all have strengths and weaknesses and you can get help in any area. But everyone needs an ability to work with other people. Be polite, positive, and helpful toward others, and assume others are doing the same toward you. Here are some pages that might help:

Scotty and the bloody knife.jpg
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I hope you enjoy it here and write a lot of funny stuff! Spıke Ѧ 03:16 22-Aug-14

Hello there[edit]

Hi Snarglefoop. I presume this is the real deal and not someone else logging in here? I see you were active on the Fork and over at Illogicopedia. So you know how these sites work which is good. Trust you will want to stick around. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 08:00, August 22, 2014 (UTC)

Yes, I'm real -- I just looked in the bathroom mirror, and that's me, alright. Thanks for asking. I don't know how active I'll be (well, we never know that, eh?) but I hope to at least remain a minor presence, haunting the shadows, for some time to come. Snarglefoop (talk) 12:36, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
That's fine. I didn't interact with anyone for the first three months of my time on Unc (as the edit history will reveal). Then I ventured into UN:VFH territory...--Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 12:42, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Holy Grail! This is Snargelfoop over here! I can't believe this! It must be a prank! Anton (talk) 14:10, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Anyway, welcome to the site-that-shouldn't-be-named, the spoon, the scary place or how else it's called! Anton (talk) 14:14, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Errm gurgle eh ... why do I suddenly feel like I'm standing at the red line stop in Harvard Square, and I've only just realized that I've forgotten my clothes?
But thanks for the welcome! (And btw I really am mostly on vaca this month, comme il dit over on Illogicopedia.) Snarglefoop (talk) 15:06, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Welcome from me too. I'm sure it's terribly significant or suspicious that I have mysteriously reappeared as well, on this very same page; probably a sign that it's all a conspiracy to make us see yellow cars, or something like that. But I assure you, there are no yellow cars. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr talkcontribs 15:12, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Jesus Christ! Llwy as well! Guys, I thought you all vanished. Anton (talk) 15:41, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Well, as you are both here you might be interested in checking out new forums. We've had a lot of news recently! Anton (talk) 16:33, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Oh, you did, and I'm late again! Anton (talk) 16:38, August 22, 2014 (UTC)

Your articles[edit]

Snargle, as you are here, I would love to see your articles transported from the other site and I think other users would, too. You've written a lot of great pieces there! Are you considering doing this? Anton (talk) 18:29, August 22, 2014 (UTC)

Definitely, yes. However, August was busy doing something which was no doubt important and urgent, and it seemed to need some help so it got September to join it, and then both of them seemed to want me to do stuff with them, and so the three of us sat and watched a few weeks roll by and anyway that's what I've been up to.... Snarglefoop (talk) 02:18, September 13, 2014 (UTC)


Hello and welcome! When installing an article in the main encyclopedia, just use the Move button — you must have one by now. This method will preserve previous edits in the History.

Even if you use Move, though, the unnecessary page in your userspace remains, and you should list it on QVFD so that we delete it. If you use Move, then the page in your userspace becomes a redirect, and there is a special format (with {{Redirect}}) to ensure that we delete the redirect and not the actual page. Cheers! Spıke Ѧ 10:19 14-Sep-14

I actually did know about 'move', and even tried to use it here. Unfortunately, 'move' refused; for whatever reason the system wouldn't let me move the page on top of the redirect which was there.
Since in this case, the edit history consisted of no more than a dozen entries, all done within the space of a few hours, it seemed like it wasn't much of a loss to just paste in the text, so I did that. Snarglefoop (talk) 13:34, September 14, 2014 (UTC)

It was because there was a redirect and that is viewed as deleting content unless you have additional rights. If you are done with the copy in your mainspace, please list it on QVFD (just for practice). Spıke Ѧ 13:58 14-Sep-14


Hi Foop! As far as I know, you have never taken part in a writing competition on Uncyclopedia before. So what would you say to a suggestion of taking part in the the one that is taking place right now? (It's going to last till October the 4th.) Anton (talk) 19:50, September 22, 2014 (UTC)

Gee I dunno, I think I need some questions answered first -- like, what the heck is a garden strimmer? It sounds either kind of lewd or kind of dangerous, unless maybe it's like a stalker who peers over the hedge into your garden when you're not home...Snarglefoop (talk) 03:02, September 25, 2014 (UTC)


If nominating an article for deletion, you must place {{VFD}} at the top of that article. This is part of the task of giving the original author(s) their due notice that their work is about to be huffed. You should also adjust the clock in the ballot to the time you placed the {{VFD}}. Spıke Ѧ 22:47 22-Sep-14

Oops! Sorry about that! Snarglefoop (talk) 22:49, September 22, 2014 (UTC)

Interview for the UnSignpost[edit]

Hello Mr Poof! You don't have to stand up! Politeness isn't all that matters, and you'll really hurt yourselves, especially with these handcuffs. Back to the topic, which we haven't yet mentioned, are you willing to answer some of the questions UnSignpost editors have? Yes? Oh, that's very kind of you!

  1. Let's begin with the most important. How many Uncyclopedians, do you think, will it take to eat an elephant on the run? Anton (talk) 19:27, September 26, 2014 (UTC)
    Well that really depends on how long the run is, doesn't it? I mean, if it's a really short run, like how long a typical first run movie runs before it comes out on DVD these days, it'll take a good number of them. On the other hand, if it's, say, a Shadowrun, the number may be different. (Actually I'm not sure I know what I'm talking about here -- let me make a quick check... Google says Shadowrun is a "deck building" game, which comes as a bit of a surprise. So I guess it would depend on whose house you decide to put a deck on, how big their back yard is, and how far they live from the nearest Home Depot.) And frankly I'm not sure you can even get elephants at Home Depot. Snarglefoop (talk) 19:36, September 26, 2014 (UTC)
  2. But what can you get at Home Depot then? Anton (talk) 19:39, September 26, 2014 (UTC)
Mastodons are being cloned even as you read this. Of course there may be a few gaps in the DNA, so the result may not be exactly like mastodons were 'way back when.
Well now that's a good question. I went to their website to find the answer, and it appears that they currently are offering upgradable security systems as well as large quantities of malware to anyone who's willing to haul it away, and they also seem to be offering new identities to any of their customers who think they might need them. (Elsewhere in the news, I've seen hints that they might offer Mastodons some time in the near future, but it all depends, and that's not currently mentioned on their U.S. website. Perhaps some of their foreign affiliates already have them in stock.) Snarglefoop (talk) 19:53, September 26, 2014 (UTC)
See, they found this carcass, buried in, like, ice, from, like, a long long long time ago, and then the debate raged, should they eat it (in the name of Science, to, you know, see what those things really tasted like), or should they clone it (in the name of Science, because, it would be just, like, so cool, y'know). Last I heard the cloners were winning the argument, but you know how people are; they might still end up eating it instead. Snarglefoop (talk) 20:33, September 26, 2014 (UTC)
Or maybe it was mammoths.[citation needed] Oh, well, somewhere in the M's. Snarglefoop (talk) 20:37, September 26, 2014 (UTC)
  1. This is an interesting insight into the cloning of animals, starting with letter M! Now, on a topic more related to you, what have been your relation to mammoths during your teenage years? Have you rebelled against them being cloned or eaten? Have you led a Liberate the Mammoths organisation? Anton (talk) 22:13, September 26, 2014 (UTC)
Every normal teenager goes through this phase!
Wait -- what have you heard? Who's been telling you this? What are they saying about me and mammoths?
Of course I admit that as a teenager, I may have been just a little tiny bit ... eh ... fixated, I guess, on amebeledons, but that's just totally normal, almost everybody goes through that phase. Anything else you may have heard is ... well it's all just made up. Don't believe it. Snarglefoop (talk) 00:13, September 27, 2014 (UTC)
  1. So the rumours of you beheading a goddess are also false? You can be honest, because you won't go in court for that. You know that goddesses grow heads fairly easily? Anton (talk) 08:12, September 28, 2014 (UTC)
No, of course not!!
Er, wait, no, I mean, yes, of course they are!
Wait, which goddess was this?
Beheading, sure, but you need to watch the other end. As I'm sure you know Slitheria is reputed to grow two tails if one is cut off. According to legend, one of her earlier incarnations ended rather badly after an unfortunate encounter with Julia Child, during which Slitheria's tail became tangled in a Mixmaster and turned into a black hole. The whole studio imploded, and it was only by the quick thinking of the fire department that Julia Child herself was not also engulfed -- or at any rate, so goes the story. (There used to be a Wikipedia page on the incident but it seems to have been taken down.) Snarglefoop (talk)
  1. Here we go! We finally reached the point where you can't retreat anymore! I've been waiting for this since the birth of my great-grandfather. Really, how come you know so much about all this and next to nothing about the location of your wallet? (Yes, you can check... Nobody believes at once.) Anton (talk) 18:56, October 13, 2014 (UTC)

On a very separately related note...[edit]

The last image is great! If you made it yourself, then we might as well nominate it on VFP! Just one thing: could you, please, re-upload it under the name File:Cthulhu-elephant-1.jpg? There's a typo in its current title. Anton (talk) 18:37, October 3, 2014 (UTC)

I did the chopping to put him (or it or whatever) on the elephant, but the elephant and Cthulhu already existed separately (and are both reasonably well known). You can find the original Cthulhu image just by googling "Cthulhu on a bicycle". (The spelling error is also original with me.) Snarglefoop (talk) 23:30, October 3, 2014 (UTC)
Still it's a good photoshop. The images in User:Snarglefoop/Flying toasters could easily be featured as well! When the competition ends or before that, if I'm not lazy, I'll go on an image hunt. Anton (talk) 18:58, October 13, 2014 (UTC)

Flying toasters[edit]

Hi Snargle! I remember you said that the article was not entirely complete... In that case, I would love to see any additions, and the page is already on VFH and getting a good score! Anton (talk) 16:53, October 20, 2014 (UTC)

Holy flying mice! That is totally cool!
I actually said it was incomplete because I thought it needed more material, not because I had more material to put on it. (A subtle but important distinction...) Snarglefoop (talk) 17:44, October 20, 2014 (UTC)
Could you expand the history section? You extended the definition of a flying toaster to dragons, but it could fit many more objects! What about the giant meteorite that toasted a great surface on the Earth right before the dinosaurs became extinct? Anton (talk) 18:12, October 20, 2014 (UTC)
Well, it didn't technically, but the point is that a large surface was toasted after the collapse of the meteorite in question. Anton (talk) 18:14, October 20, 2014 (UTC)

By the way, TheCan added a sub-section to Flying toasters. You can check it out and see if it fits! Anton (talk) 10:31, October 31, 2014 (UTC)

Yeah, I know.
I haven't read it in detail. Didn't look like it fitted quite the way I'd like but OTOH it looked like he'd (or she'd) invested a substantial chunk of time in it and it doesn't seem to be awful so meh, I dunno.... I did like the idea of the Yucatan Bomber being a flying toaster but I've been bizzy and boaring and haven't done anything lately, not even answer simple interview questions... Snarglefoop (talk) 12:10, October 31, 2014 (UTC)
Please talk to him! I didn't think it fit well either, and he did work a lot on it, but there are alternatives to reverting, including someone working harder on integrating it, or finding a new and better home for the text. Spıke Ѧ 12:28 31-Oct-14
On rereading it, it has a slightly different style (tons of footnotes) but is pursuing the same type of humor. I've given TheCan more detailed review on his talk page. I see above that, if he read this page, he would have seen an invitation to do exactly what he did. Of course, adding on is fair game, even to an article on VFH. Spıke Ѧ 12:44 31-Oct-14
Aw, gee, thanks guys. I'm glad my efforts show, whether it's good or not. Anyways, not to sound highfalutin', but I'll be putting my comments on the article's talk page. Feel free to move over any of your pertinent points of contention or whatever so that mine have some context.
TheCan (talk) 15:49, October 31, 2014 (UTC)

So you did well in PLS, huh? Congratulations...[edit]

...Now help this website by becoming a regular contributor. Get on VFD, VFH, VFP, Village Dump, write some articles and do some shit. NOW! The preceding unsigned comment was added by ScottPat (talk • contribs)

Ah crap. That's just about exactly what my boss said to me, not more than a week ago -- "Do some shit. NOW!" sigh... Snarglefoop (talk) 15:31, October 31, 2014 (UTC)
Too much shit, too little time Spıke Ѧ 15:50 31-Oct-14

Get your free UnSignpost subscription today![edit]

Anton (talk) 18:22, November 9, 2014 (UTC)

Flying toasters[edit]

..will be airbourne at 0000 hours. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 22:17, December 7, 2014 (UTC)

Dear Snarglefoop,

Thank you for your support for the Portora Royal School page. Wilde would be proud.

Best regards,

an admirer

Hey New Kid[edit]

Yes, I can call you the new kid because I retired here before you started. Just wanted to tell you I found your user page pretty amusing. And you can tell that T. Rex the pogo stick wasn't invented until the 20th century, and the last of the dinosaurs all died off many years earlier after a giant meteor struck New Jersey. King Admin Alden Loveshade, by proclamation of Sannse most noble ruler of the Internet King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  22:12, June 15, 2018 (UTC)

Alden, there is an editor here that would say exactly the same thing, but would be serious about it. And then would jumble around the article with a completely unuseful re-edit. Both of you might probably get to "meet" him/her/it, if you haven't already in your past tenures. Just rollback but send them a note that they're full of it. --Nigel Scribbler sig2.png (talk) 19:59, July 3, 2018 (UTC)

Compromise skin[edit]

If this is ready for prime time, please add a link at the top of the list in Recent Articles on the front page. New articles tend to get shoved way down the list and out of view too quickly. Thanks! --Nigel Scribbler sig2.png (talk) 19:59, July 3, 2018 (UTC)

Please sign your edits[edit]

It looks like you made a bunch of edits on QVFD and didn't sign. Please always sign.  :) Admin DAP Dame Pleb Com. <font="Times New Roman">Miley <font="Times New Roman">Spears (talk) 02:51, August 8, 2018 (UTC)

Aha, but the QVFD instructions box says not to sign, which itself contradicts the statement that VFD rules still apply to QVFD in the same box. Everywhere else, we sign or are branded with what we do. I do prefer being consistent; that QVFD rule makes my brain hurt. --Nigel Scribbler sig2.png (talk) 03:14, August 8, 2018 (UTC)
... um ... I suppose I could sign them and then delete the signature afterwards...? (See, that would put the signature in the edit history, so they'd be technically signed, but it wouldn't be visible on ... oh forget it.) Snarglefoop (talk) 03:33, August 8, 2018 (UTC)
Sorry I didn't see that rule, so thanks for telling me about it. It should be changed so we know who's posting.
People were worried about a few words taking up space 9 years ago when I started here, not an issue now. The rule needs to be changed as Sannse, who's both an Uncyclopedia admin and Wikia staff, says on signatures here. Admin DAP Dame Pleb Com. <font="Times New Roman">Miley <font="Times New Roman">Spears (talk) 16:59, August 8, 2018 (UTC)
FWIW it looks like most people have been signing them. So, to be consistent, they should probably be signed. (And really, why not? (Do I even want to know why not?)) Snarglefoop (talk) 03:33, August 8, 2018 (UTC)
And by the way I think you're not really supposed to stomp on somebody else's comment on their own talk page, even if it was a dumb comment. So just to assure that the record's clean, here's my over-scribbled comment back:
um.... Oops? Sorry about that. Snarglefoop (talk) 03:06, August 8, 2018 (UTC)
From the rules at the top of the QVFD page (contained in {{QVFDr}}): "Do not sign QVFD nominations. It just takes up space and annoys people." As Nigel said. Some people sign, though. Doesn't matter really, I guess. I wonder if you could get Twinkle to work on this wiki and produce a CSD log user subpage. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr talkcontribs • 07:51 8 August 2018
Who is Twinkle? Does he/she live on a star?? :)--Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 12:52, August 8, 2018 (UTC)
Isn't Twinkle one of the crats? Or maybe I'm confused -- she could be a Wikia staffer. (Or stockholder?) Snarglefoop (talk) 14:43, August 8, 2018 (UTC)
wikipedia:Wikipedia:Twinkle. And it wouldn't be a "CSD" log, I suppose. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr talkcontribs • 19:27 8 August 2018

You may have to revote[edit]

Voting options have changed on Forum:Hosting options for Uncyclopedia (wikia). Because the set up of the vote has been changed, some people, including possibly you, need to know, You may have to recast your vote for it to count. Voting will end on Saturday, 23 March 2019 (check vote for time zone; currently it's set for Hawaii). King Admin Alden Loveshade, by proclamation of Sannse most noble ruler of the Internet King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  16:51, March 16, 2019 (UTC)

NOTICE: If you respond to this directly, it will actually take you to the template I used for this message, so please don't respond directly. The technical reason for this error is I don't know what the hell I'm doing. (If someone wants to fix the template for me, go ahead.) King Admin Alden Loveshade, by proclamation of Sannse most noble ruler of the Internet King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  00:57, March 17, 2019 (UTC)  


Some people who voted were kicked out as sockpuppets the vote has to have a recount! Black Enforcer (talk) 15:59, April 9, 2019 (UTC)

  • Since there were only, like, a dozen votes or something, it shouldn't take more than a few days to count them again. Snarglefoop (talk) 01:02, 25 April 2019 (UTC)

Holy flying Fonzini brothers and a cloud of mice![edit]

The site is up and running!

(Or walking, anyway.)

(Or maybe crawling if too many people log in.)

But it's all here! Fantabulous! Snarglefoop (talk) 01:02, 25 April 2019 (UTC)

Looking real good. Thanks, all! --Nigel Scribbler sig2.png (talk) 21:15, 17 May 2019 (UTC)


Can you email me at Thanks. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 23:23, 12 May 2019 (UTC)

Sorry about that -- I thought I had; but maybe not. In any case I did so once again. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 00:40, 13 May 2019 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia:Active Admins[edit]

You can add yourself to the list above. If you prefer not to talk to users generally at this time, perhaps you can just enter your username without linking(?). --Nigel Scribbler sig2.png (talk) 21:14, 17 May 2019 (UTC)

The image choice[edit]


Well I did some cropping to it before uploading; I was trying to find a photo that was not violating copyrights for Pensacola. There was something there and you may want to look at Pensacola Christian College on to make the connection. Some of the older alumni well they say the horror stories well imagine pushing a rock up a hill so to speak. Illinois and Southern Baptists saw expanded parts too. I had some fun with Baptists too as you have to imagine my relatives going to the basement of a that church and play poker, some of them smoke and will give their earnings to the grandkids saying "Here's $50, don't blow it in one place." When you were in grade school with that large sum of cash; it's a good chance they were playing "deal me in." I needed something truly poignant in nature to illustrate the war on science --Factfinder (talk) 05:49, 20 May 2019 (UTC)

The issue was not the cropping, nor really the Sisyphus reference. It's that it was scaled wrong. You had apparently shrunk it side to side and failed to scale it top to bottom. The result was extremely distorted, and, really, it looked kind of ridiculous. The student in the image appeared stretched out vertically, and the rock no longer looked round; it looked more like a menhir or something. My fix to it consisted of spending a few minutes with Google Image Search to find the original image, which I then cropped to fit (without distorting it -- just cropping it), and then I uploaded it to replace your extremely distorted version. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 06:00, 20 May 2019 (UTC)
I'm not sure we're on the same wavelength here. Cropping an image is cutting part of it off. Scaling an image is like using a magnifying glass to make it look bigger (or smaller). When you scale an image (or magnify it, or shrink it) you must always magnify or shrink it by the same amount top-to-bottom as you do side-to-side, or the result looks distorted. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 06:07, 20 May 2019 (UTC)
The image originally was much longer (panorama.) I wanted it to be a portrait arrangement so it would not take up room. There was some ideas I was able to take this article especially when a contact who is transplant from Chicago, I can find the original shot for you where I was using to snag the image and arrange it. This is the first time I really got the jist and feel of how Wiki formatting is.--Factfinder (talk) 06:15, 20 May 2019 (UTC)

VFD bis[edit]

  • Your comments on Zero Wing ("it's not really our style here") are a persuasive vote to Delete. Only, you voted Keep.
  • Several other ballots await your vote.
  • I would appreciate your push for Advertising to go over the cliff so my new article can take its place. Spıke Radiomicrophone.gif03:51 31-May-19
I'm sorry about Zero Wing. I just find it really .... well, funny. I can't look at it without laughing. This probably indicates some weakness in my sense of humor.... (There's a reason I mostly work on the server stuff, as well as a reason why my company hardly ever lets me talk to customers). Maybe I really should slurp it over to Illogicopedia.
Anyway I voted to kill Advertising -- but only once (rules, right?); if we're going for 5 'kill' votes then it still needs one more. (But it's awful -- maybe just kill it at 4 and then replace it?) Snarglefoop (talk) 04:16, 31 May 2019 (UTC)
Thanks for your vote. I've asked Romartus to be the fifth. A few years ago, during a big Slough of Despond, I was huffing pages on 4 votes or a really long time; but we have been able to marshal 5 eventually and that's better than cutting corners. If Zero Wing really makes you laugh, well, that's what the website is about, though you might jump in, preserve what you like, and repair what the rest of us dislike. Does Zero Wing mean you're demented? We could vote on that later. Spıke Radiomicrophone.gif04:29 31-May-19

UnSignpost is back from the dead[edit]

Llwy-ar-lawr talkcontribs • 03:16 22 June 2019