Wog

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Italian Wog Pia Miranda is a wog who surely eats gnocchi, follows Juventus and says 'arrivederci.'

“I'm not prejudiced, I hate all Wogs equally”

~ Naomi Robson

“The people have got to know that their President is not a Wog”

~ Richard Nixon on Woggagate

“We acknowledge that we are standing on the land that belongs to the Indigenous Italianiginal peoples and the Greek Islander peoples”

~ Lowitja O'Donoghue

A wog is a Southern European who migrated to Australia on learning that Australia had a large supply of rich Vegemite just waiting to be mined and sold to the international vegemite market, which was Australia’s most successful market, valued at $2.00 per year, only behind convict-skinned coats. Australia’s Highest Court, the St Joseph’s College for Rich Gay Mama’s Boys, heard testimony and concluded that 'wog' was an acronym for, ‘Whitey Or Gubba’.

History of Wogs[edit]

Early history[edit]

The Wog flag. The black symbolises old Wog women's funeral clothes, the red symbolises Bolognese sauce and the yellow symbolises the Honda Prelude god, sacred to young Wog boys

Wog migration to Australia began with the end of the Anglo-Robotic-Werewolves wars of 2134, where Wogs realised they were living in slums when their true desires were to live in dumps so they hopped onto their spaceships, whilst drinking vino and singing ‘Shaddup Ya Face’, sung by legendary Italian singer Luciano Pavawhatafatbastard, and went skipping towards what they believed would be the greatest of all dumps, Brisbane. However Brisbane turned out to be shit which wasn't as good as dump, so Wogs checked out Melbourne and Adelaide, which were crap but Wogs considered crap to be better than shit, although not as good as dump but, at the time, Australia didn't have any dumps, only crap and shit. After careful consideration, Wogs realised their dream of living in a dump would never come true so they settled in the Adelaide and Melbourne craps. Four years later a group of Wogs discovered and migrated to garbage bin, which is now modern day Sydney, and are still yet to be found.

Wogs Get on Non-Wogs' Nerves[edit]

Greek Wog Toula Hatsitsopandopolopolopolopolous

In 2145, Wog populations began expanding all over Adelaide and Melbourne and the native Australians, the VB Tribes of Westend Draught, became concerned with the ever-increasing presence of gold chains, Nissan Skylines, garlic odours and the constant screenings of My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Furthermore, the natives became concerned with language barriers, as natives used their mouths to talk whereas Wogs used unusual hand gestures which baffled psychologists and check-out chicks. This caused the Government to pass the ‘Fucking Wog Cunt, Get Outta My Country Act 2148’, introduced by Nazi Bitches Party leader Pauline Hanson-Hitler-Smith who, in her maiden speech, stated to Queersland Parliament “I believe we are in danger of being swamped by salami” and this led to Six Pack Beer Bounties being placed on Wogs’ heads. However, this approach was proven insignificant as more Wogs migrated to Adelaide and Melbourne, attracted to the smell of Pizza shops and Calzone stands. The continuing fear of Wogs by the VB Tribes led to the 2146 ‘Carnevale War', which lasted for three terrifying minutes, in which 9 billion Wogs were killed. Consequently, for the next 3 000 years, Australia was invaded and ruled by a large wombat-like creature called Kevin Rudd, who invaded Australia from the Congo, 12km north of Scandinavia, and who ended the war through his powerful army of Julia-Gillardbots and brought peace and never ending supplies of ‘Fuck Work Choices’ badges.

Current Status of Wogs[edit]

"and remember Wogs Rule!" - Steve Irwin, the woggiest Wog of them all

Despite the peace, the damage has been done. The population of Wogs in Australia has decreased from a population of 9.1 billion to a dangerously (and desirably) low population of 36, and are now listed on the Federal Government’s ‘Endangered Ethnics Act 7454’. Although it is believed that the introduction of the Asian, which has resulted in increasing competition for English classes and rice, has been responsible for most recent population declines, Wogs are being wiped out through illegal poaching for their rare and valuable covering, the Kappa Outfit, worth around $2 billion on the Bullshit market.

There is money to be made out of Wogs[edit]

Wogs are a major tourism attraction in Adelaide and Melbourne and generate around 85 cents per year for SA Tourism (yes we have tourists so stop laughing bastards) and $1.89 per year for Victorian Tourism. Although they are hard to spot, Wogs can be identified through their Adidas track pants, Everlast hats and Alfa Romeo cars and are usually seen hanging around nightclubs in the deepest darkest jungles of Henley Beach, where tourists are often mesmerised by their ‘lets play soccer bro, sick bro sick, sick, sick, give me some biscotti bro’ chants.

If Lindsay Lohan was a Wog, her life would be completely fucked much better
"Wogs are the cause of South Australia's drought, they race their cars which released smoke which formed clouds and now the bloody rain can't get through those clouds, its scientific fact Goddamit!" - South Australian Premier Mike Rammed

Wogs are usually fat mothers boys who, having been raised by an illiterate single slag mother, so they have a pathetic upbringing. Eventualy when they turn 85 whale years they step up to adulthood by marrying their grandmas. It is at that stage they start eating their own.

Wogs hate reading it actually is an allergy to them, which is why book stores have been installed in various shopping malls as a way to repel filthy idiotic wogs. There was a case when a 3 year old wog 'boy' wandered into a borders books chain unsupervised (normally he is stuffed in his fathers armpit) he was mesmerised by all the books and things there until the father found out. He was so horrified at his poofta son that when he tried to reclaim his woglin the close proximity to 'fucken books' cause his bowels to erupt and his brain to explode.

Basicly Wogs are idiotic robots who are devolving. Every 3rd world nation and shitty country wants to become a wog. Which is very helpful because it will make it much easier to round up and destroy all the scum when we have to massively lower the world population.

See also[edit]