Homosexuology
“If the widespread practice of homosexuality will bring about the destruction of your nation, if it will bring about terrorist bombs, if it'll bring about earthquakes, tornadoes and possibly a meteor, it isn't necessarily something we ought to open our arms to.”
“My interest in homosexuology is purely professional....seriously...”
Homosexuology is the study of the affects of homosexuals upon the ecosystem, the environment and global politics. Although initially started by Pat Robertson in order to track links between homosexuality and climate change it has now garnered huge support from communities and individuals from around the world.
Pat Robertson[edit]
In his controversial claim that homosexuality can cause tornadoes, political strife and meteors Pat Robertson garnered scepticism from the rest of the scientific community. A number of scientists claimed that Robertson didn't have the necessary scientific background to make such an assertion.[1]
To back up their claim scientists called upon all homosexuals from around America to meet at one point and do what-they-do-best and test the ecological reaction.
Just as the scientists were wrapping up a huge tornado struck the city, breaking the dam and smiting all the homosexuals and scientists. Although all evidence of the homosexual orgy was destroyed during the flood Pat Robertson still claims that this was its cause.
Pat is an activist in the "save our environment" organisation, campaigning to end homosexuality and the threat of climate change that it creates.[2]
Evidence[edit]
A recent study, based on PR (Pat Robertson) hypothesis, has shown that Florida and California have the worst weather in all America. California has experienced storms, tornadoes and generally bad weather that homosexuologists claim is a result of their pro-gay stance. [3]
Similarly Florida is also considered the most un-visited sector of the United States, with little or no tourists. Hawaii is also wracked with awful weather, along with numerous other gay-supporting states.
This could explain why California, Florida and Hawaii receive no tourists.[4]
Whereas Alabama, South Dakota, North Dakota and Utah receive a huge influx of tourists due to their wonderful God-given weather. This is considered by many homosexuologists as proof of the PR Hypothesis.[5]
Hunting Homosexuals[edit]
Because of the negative affects of homosexuals on climate change the general agreement of the public is that homosexuals can be dealt with in anyway necessary to prevent a possible ecological catastrophe.
A number of people have created large “homo-hunting” rings around the United States in order to deal with the issue. Eco-warriors and activists have banded together in order to eliminate the problem with force.
Although it is usually encouraged that you do your own hunting “homo-hunters for hire” are becoming more and more frequent.[6]
One homo-hunter, code named K.O, has now been given his own adventure drama on Fox. In it his catch phrase is “sodomise this!” at which point he will usually liquidate the homosexual in question.
Controversy[edit]
In response pro-homosexual organizations have started a campaign called “ ‘‘Sodomise’’? My ass!”
It is their evil agenda to encourage our hapless little babies that homosexuals don’t cause tornadoes, meteors or any ecological problems at all.
They also want them to become gay! Oh no! Homo-proselytizing! Make a mob, quick!
References[edit]
See also[edit]