Hugo Boss

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Hugo Boss is an international fashion brand based in Stuttgart, Germany, that specializes in high-end mens and womens underwear. It makes bras too.
It is named after its two founders, Bugo and Hoss. Originally Hugo Boss used Jewish slave labour to make uniforms for military leaders; today it uses Chinese slave labour to make uniforms for arrogant fuck head managers and wankers. persumably because Chinese slave labourers work longer hours for less pay.

In the beforetimes, German people didn't stand on a habit to wear underwear. This was the driving factor in the establishment of this brand.

Today, while such disgusting sell outs like Lewis Fucking Vuitten, Prada and that Fucking Gucci for Gucci Manes went out to sell themselves in record companies, Hugo Boss didn't lose its composure and stayed on the right place. So, even those nasty school girls and yankees or fake-ass gangstas can have LV or Gucci, they still can get nowhere to purchase this little apparel label, which is made only for the boss of the bosses (its not because this brand is low key).

The splendid history[edit]

Houshi Boss, a subsidiary of Hugo Boss
  • 1880: Bugo and Hoss met each other at BeerFest.
  • 1881: Bugo and Hoss both hated the French and thought that Louis Vuitton sucked balls.
  • 1882: Bugo and Hoss found mutual ground for friendship after discovering that both wore underwear, unlike their German of French contemporaries.
  • 1884: Bugo and Hoss created an underwear fashion brand Bugo Hoss.
  • 1890: Bugo Hoss officially went bankrupt since the people of Germany didn't need their wares.
  • 1914: World War I began.
  • 1918: World War I ended. Adolf Hitler concluded the German defeat was because soldiers didn't wear underwear.
  • 1930: Adolf Hitler gave Bugo Hoss $2,000 to produce "Untergarmentsturmensteins" for the army. $1998.00 was given to marketing, the other $2.00 was distributed to staff wages and materials.
  • 1934: A marketing typo results in the brand changing its name to Hugo Boss
  • 1939: Hitler is furious that his Bugo Hoss jackboots and jodpers are no longer cool since everyone is now wearing Hugo Boss but World War II begins and occupies the time he could have been restocking his wardrobe instead of fighting the Communists and making Hitler Memes for Youtube.
  • 1945: World War II ends. Germany wins the war and Hugo Boss "Untergarmentsturmensteins" are praised for saving the German army.
  • 1963: Hitler is killed in a car accident whilst wearing A Hugo Boss "Hattenschweremeinstein sturguvurst".
  • 1964: A sharp eyed fashion reporter notices it was a cheap Taiwanese rip off. Hitler is forever shamed as being a fake ass cheapskate poser for buying cheap e-bay replicas.


Today, the principal of Hugo Boss group is a good guy, and he loves to invest his money to many Asian-Pacific nations and establish the subsidiaries. This makes Hugo Boss became more richer and also developing the market across worldwide. The most known subsidiary is "Fugo Boss" which is expanding their market inside Japan. A "Houshi Boss" is an another growing subsidiary which has 1 billion market inside China and Hong Kong. "Hobo Boss" is the vogue fashion brand in India.