Speed-typing
Speed-typing is a very dangerous and competitive blood sport. Although it has been outlawed in many countries, it can still be found in the underground of underdeveloped nations, such as; Gaia, Sims, Azeroth, Neopets, RuneScape, Final Fantasy XI, United Kingdom of America, and the Kingdom of Loathing.
According to Fox News, speed typing is more than ten times more addictive than a heroin meth and cocaine sandwich with a side of cigarettes. The typing game or type out, is played by typing and is an epidemic sweeping America's youth. Sure, this may sound fun, or even important for living in today's modern world. That's what they all say. And then "WHAM!"
How to know if your child is speed-typing[edit]
Early detection may be the key to curing a speed typist. Therefore, if you even suspect your child is speed typing, you should investigate immediately. First, break into your child's bedroom with a power drill and place holes for planting bugs like you're the East German secret police. If you find them at the computer with their head exploded, you may want to consider talking to them about their problem. But don't automatically assume their head exploded because they were speed typing! Oh, no! Kid's heads explode for many reasons. Sometimes they explode just for attention, or maybe they put too much cracked corn on their kittens before huffing. Other times, a child's head will explode from spending too much time on parody-encyclopedia websites, like uncyclopedia, or from a short in the brain computer interface of their robot tentacle arms. In any case, if your child's head explodes, they probably have many problems. You're probably just a crappy parent.
Speed typing as treatment for Typoglycema[edit]
Typoglycemais a dissease wjerw one haas a lrge ammount of speeling mitakes in thier massages brcUse tehy are mahisng teh keyboard and hopinf for teh besy.