Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/May 30

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Kim Jong Il winning in a major upset.

May 30: Memorial Day (United States), Lod's Massacre Appreciation Day (Puerto Rico)

  • 1421 – Jerome of Prague is burned at the stake for heresy and so kicks off the Memorial Day barbecue tradition.
  • 1431 – National hero of France Joan of Arc is burned at the stake in Rouen, France, after being convicted of wizardy for being able to produce milk from her breasts.
  • 1539 – Hernando de Soto discovers Florida while its natives discover Hernando de Soto. He manages to stay out of arrow range thus avoiding the traditional Florida greeting still used today.
  • 1831 – James Boyd patents the rubber fire hose not realizing that fires are made of fire and not rubber.
  • 1898 – Thomas Edison invents sand so people will have something to sit on during the US holiday.
  • 1941 – The first Axis of Evil Hot Dog Eating Competition (pictured) held in Rome.
  • 1967 – Wilbur Wright's ghost manifests itself in the body of an otter.
  • 1984Big Brother watches you after starring in an Apple commercial.
  • 1995 – Congress changes the holiday name to Meme Morial Day. Everyone is off somewhere for the day and doesn't notice.
  • 1999 – The website Unicyclopedia about everything unicycles is launched. It would eventually morph into the famous humor site Wikipedia.
  • 2002 – Slow day for Uncyclopedia editing. Readers are advised to move their lips while reading and nod their heads after every sentence to compensate.
  • 2003 – Memes about dead people flood the internet. Deceased Facebook members heartily approve.
  • 2004 – It is a slow day for Uncyclopedia editing so pet iguanas are allowed to take the controls for the day. Readership jumps 300% as intelligibility is increased.
  • 2013God recreates Earth, starting with Uncyclopedia.
  • 2017 – The Indy 500 are convicted in federal court along with ringleader Indiana Jones.