Cheesecake of Doom
The Cheesecake of Doom was created as a weapon by chef Mervin Mayes to feed to notorious critics, and competition. Its main ingredient is pure evil, with a dash of cinnamon for taste. This cheesecake has been known to drive many people mad just by looking at it. Only Chuck Norris has ever eaten it with no side effects.
History of Use[edit]
This cheescake has only been used as a last resort in chef wars. In the first Chef War, the cheesecake was invented, and used to kill 75% of the chefs to eliminate competition. However, Mervin Mayes was caught, and jailed in a local prison. There, he spent the rest of his days whittling soap into spoons. However, another chef found the recipe five years later. His name was Jerry Schloss. During a soup and stew competition in 1992, Shloss attempted to use the same amounts of cinnamon and pure evil used in the cheescake in the other contestants food, to kill the judges and take the prize by default. But his plain failed when the ingredients created a chemical reaction with the broth in the soups, and ruined the contest. He was disqualified, and his cooking license was asploded.
Side effects on regular people[edit]
The Cheesecake of Doom has many side effects on normal, mortal people. It causes sudden eye gouging, foaming from the mouth, realizing there's no cure for cancer while people are being snarky about cheesecake, being a sod, cardiac arrest, incontinence, chicken pox, turkey pox, ham pox, beef pox, diaper rash, dyslexia, near-sightedness, nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea, Pepto-Bismol syndrome, and awkwardness. And death.
Cure[edit]
There is no cure, yet. The Cure for the Cheesecake of Doom Foundation (CCDF) are working around the clock, payed by donations from viewers like you, to find the cure. We are almost there. With your help, we can find a cure for this terrible food. Thank you.
Recipe[edit]
To make the Cheesecake of Doom, you first need a cake pan. Then, you need a mixing bowl. After that, you need a mixing spoon. A blender is preferred for better cake quality. Then, you need an oven. Which works. Now, you must get some cheesecake mix. Prepare the cheesecake as it says on the box, but add 1 more ingredient: 2 cups of pure evil. Bake it in the cake pan, and let it cool. Then, serve to enemies. Unless you're Chuck Norris, then you can eat it yourself.