Forum:Ultimate Flamewar

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This is the Ultimate Flamewar of Ultimate Destiny

Good guys, bad guys and explosions as far as the eye can see

I read the flamewar guidelines, so please don't ban me

Let's start the Ultimate Flamewar of Ultimate Destiny

<insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 02:02, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

I love you. Hug? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 05:24, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

You are stupid. Your mom is stupid. Your dad is stupid. Your siblings are all stupid. Even your dog is stupid. And, most important of all, your thread is stupid.

Am I doing this right? :) -- The Colonel (talk) 07:42, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

I'd rather relace my shoes than date your sister. Of course, I'm married, so I'm sorta taken anyway. Taken WITH LOVE! (canned laughter)--<<>> 13:50, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

That sucks, and you suck. Next!!! -- The Colonel (talk) 14:05, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

NO U--BOMB 20:48, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

GO EAT SHIT

Fisher Price! - Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 23:41, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

The Calgary Flamewars

FLAME WAR!

--    01:02, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

<insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 00:37, 9 January 2009 (UTC) p.s. I own.

Hey look! Penis Man!

Lieutenant THEDUDEMAN Dude ... Totally UOTM KUN GotA F@H 01:31, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

OH! OH MY GAWD! MY EYES! MY VIRGIN EYES! IT BURNS SO BAD! PLEASE STOP! NO MORE, PLEASE!!! GET RID OF IT! <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 02:15, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

OMG! PENISMAN IS BACK! - Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 04:37, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

Did you just call me a monkey?

HUH?! C'mon Costas! Space Ghost 02:00, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

MY EYES STILL BURN! (see above) <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 02:18, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

Admit it, you're just as turned on as the rest of us. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 03:08, Jan 9

Yeah, I am... or rather I WOULD be- IF I WAS A GIRL!!!<insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 01:46, 10 January 2009 (UTC)

So...you are. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 04:47, Jan 10

No, I'm a guy. <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 20:00, 10 January 2009 (UTC)

You want a peace of the KING!? THE MONKEY KING?!! -RAHB 05:39, 10 January 2009 (UTC)

As long as It's not PENISMAN again...<insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 20:00, 10 January 2009 (UTC)

Hey look! NOT Penis Man!

I like this image more. -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 22:31, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

My important contribution

-

Kingkitty ~Fuck you Brett~ ~Die in a fire Favre~

Those eyes... They burn into my soul like Tails Doll himself... Quick! Somebody huff it before it's too late! <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 20:02, 10 January 2009 (UTC)

...Cheeseburger?--BOMB 02:49, 13 January 2009 (UTC)

Yes, please. -- REGRETTENENBAUMIS DEAD TALK! 03:37, 17 January 2009 (UTC)

Would you like fries with that? Heya!^Talkyplace _Whatever

Cainad Bitches You Spags Out

Fuck all of you fucking spags! I put assloads of my time into writing those damned Chronicles, and now what? It's not worth shit to any of you? GOD DAMN. How about you all go die slowly in a turbulent river of acidic diarrhea, huh? HOW ABOUT THAT?!

Oh, and <insert name here>. You.

<insert name here>. That your career on Uncyclopedia has come to this will, I am sure, have come as a surprise to many, not least your erstwhile smug and, as it turns out, disastrously complacent self. However, to those with a more rounded experience of your methods and morality, both the beneficiaries and the victims of your self-righteous and self-appointed crusading, it will remain a source of bed-wetting astonishment that it has taken so long for the hive mind to bring themselves to bear upon your arrogant and devious person.

You are, in the well-chosen words of our resident hate-shitters in describing your ilk, an unreconstructed wanker. To that one might add that you have infinitely more to say for yourself than your knowledge or experience could possibly justify, and that I have seldom found myself passing judgement on someone so evidently lacking the benefits of a damn good kicking.

You have thrust upon us your ill-informed, half-baked, out-dated and, frankly, paranoid theories for a tiresome number of posts now, and the wonder of it is that anyone continued to listen long enough for you to persist with the behaviour that has ultimately ld to your downfall. I would remind you, <insert name here>, that paranoia is often merely the flipside of egotism: both deludedly imagine the world to revolve around oneself.

While your n00bish exploits have occasionally enjoyed vindication in the past, it should be evident to anyone remotely cognisant with the facts that your roles in certain notorious events have been grossly exaggerated by both posterity - which is often inexplicably kind to the self-aggrandising - and by your own indulgently biased accounts. No doubt you like to depict yourself as a thorn in the flesh of the establishment, but closer to the truth would be to say that you are merely an irritant, and that the subsequent rashes are far more the result of your unwanted presence than of any defect on the part of those you choose to infect.

In the case of someone so self-absorbed, it is perhaps plausible that certain developments may have escaped your notice; to wit, the inexorable evolution of this forums posts and the irrefutable testimony of the hive mind, which states, if you would take note, you are not welcome any more. Once upon a time, you found and to your credit exposed corruption and conspiracy among those of whom we expected better. Your problem, it strikes me, was that you did not know what to be about next. You have continued to seek out such nefariousness, but where you have not found it you have instead imagined it - and more insidiously, implied it. If I were you, I might wish to consider whether a man who finds corruption in every place he looks might perhaps be seeing the reflection of what lies within himself.

In the instance that has brought you before me, you arrogantly pitted yourself against an organisation far more august and enduring than the windmills at which you had tilted before; and though you were but a mosquito attacking an elephant, it cannot be ignored that this mosquito wished the elephant harm, and its bite may have done so had it not been swatted.

In short, <insert name here>, there is no place for you here in the future. This is a new Uncyclopedia, a new BHOP, with new standards and a new morality. I must not allow it or its institutions - nascent and ancient alike - to be disparaged and prejudiced by the diseased mind of a wee shite like you. For this reason, I order that you be taken from this board, henceforth to a place of confinement, there to dwell in perpetual fear of being chibbed and humped by rabid schemies. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 16:23, 13 January 2009 (UTC)

That's all well and good, if a bit wordy, but it fails to explain just exactly why you're eating the stuffing out of my couch. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 19:55, 13 January 2009 (UTC)

You're just jealous that I won the flamewar just now. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 23:27, 13 January 2009 (UTC)

You may have bored the flame-war to death as well--    23:29, 13 January 2009 (UTC)

tl;dr - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 23:44, Jan 13

Worst use of {{USERNAME}} ever. I already had my wrists slit before scrolling down. Now there's blood all over my keyboard. THANKS A LOT!--<<>> 00:32, 14 January 2009 (UTC)

...toast? - Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 03:36, 14 January 2009 (UTC)

You may THINK that's all fine and dandy, but I found Cainad's TRUE message, hidden in that large text mess. Allow me to reveal it to you:

"I like little children of the same sex as myself. 2 girls 1 cup, Barney the dinosaur, and anything related to High School Musical makes me horny. Michael Jackson tried to molest me, but I beat him to it. In short, I am a sick little weirdo who has no idea what I am talking about and think I am better than everybody, including God, BENSON, and Chuck Norris. Sincerely, Cainad." <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 01:15, 17 January 2009 (UTC)

I take it from your silence that I just pwned Cainad. <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 00:34, 27 January 2009 (UTC)

What? Oh sorry, I was off being awesome. I see your puny accusations and raise you the following: google "1 man 1 jar" --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 21:39, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

That's what SHE said! <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 00:19, 6 February 2009 (UTC)

Cainad, that was worthy of an ultimate flamewar. That, in short, was kickass. Good work on that one, you must have spent a few hours on that, I trust? SPARTAN-984|Chat here|What I've Done 20:56, 7 February 2009 (UTC)

Well, someone spent a long time on it. I, um, heh... well, let's just say I like to order copypasta at Italian restaurants. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 16:38, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

Doesn't that taste too much like paper though? -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 16:52, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

It's for the fiber. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 17:18, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

It's classier in Italian. Fibra. Those Italians have a real zest for life. Fibra. It makes you want to put on wooden shoes and run with the bulls around the Eiffel tower, doesn't it? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:14, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

Or Torre Eiffel in Italian. Italian for bull is "toro". -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 23:18, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

Toro is also their word for lawnmower. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:26, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

I think that haikus

Are the best way to insult

People in flamewars

Five syllables here,

And seven go in this line..

You are all faggots. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 02:02, Feb 9

This one time we went to the funpark in Tokyo and my mom bought me a haiku. The picture said that it was strawberry flavour, but it turned out to be octopus. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 05:47, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

I fucking hate it

When things such as that happen

It pisses me off

Oh shit, I can't stop

I can't stop writing haikus

Someone please help me - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 23:37, Feb 9

You guys are worst than us IPs. So please quit calling us IPs idiots. Especialy <insert name here>. <insert name here> is quite possibly the worst fucking asshole of all the users here on Uncyclopedia.166.197.110.107 06:19, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Oh god, he just insulted Uncyclopedia! Quick, someone get the Hell Outta Here now and load it with bantillery (artillery infused with banhammers). NOW! SPARTAN-984|Chat here|What I've Done 21:06, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

The IP does have a point, though. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:18, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

As for Cainad, he/she must be a celebrity, as he/she stars in the following YouTube videos:

• <youtube>IF0vhg_qxXg</youtube>
• <youtube>jkdhlv8b2QA</youtube>
• <youtube>HUBBsA9wvXQ</youtube>
• <youtube>Z8IiJk4Imds</youtube>

<insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 02:46, 15 February 2009 (UTC)

I have NASCAR 08 and you dont! Oh, and huge YouTube influx. Anyways, bye! S-984 14:43, 15 February 2009 (UTC)

Flaming Images

-Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 16:44, 14 January 2009 (UTC) SOMEBODY CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!!!<insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 01:17, 17 January 2009 (UTC)

Nothing can withstand the awesome power of supernatural fire! -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 17:32, 30 January 2009 (UTC)

Nothing except:

• God
• Jesus
• Chuck Norris
• BENSON
• <insert name here>

<insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 05:21, 31 January 2009 (UTC)

Nothing can withstand the holy power of divine burnination! -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 11:34, 31 January 2009 (UTC)

Don't you mean regular burnination? <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.^Meh. _Meh. or something like that 19:18, 31 January 2009 (UTC)

As long as you get burned, it's all good. -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 07:23, 1 February 2009 (UTC)

I'd rather get burninated by Trogdor the Burninator. I still can't believe Strong Bad drew something that could kill Chuck Norris. SPARTAN-984|Chat here|What I've Done 21:33, 1 February 2009 (UTC)

TYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATU TYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATU TYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATU TYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATU TYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATUTYATU TYATU Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me! 03:12, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Okay Uncyclopedian, seriously, what's with that? Just asking, and also on the behalf of HTBFANJS. Either way, <ADD> Did you know that if you took the H, T, F, J, and S out of HTBFANJS you'd get BAN? </ADD> I don't really know how long you've been on here, but, ehh, this is BHOP, after all. SPARTAN-984|Chat here|What I've Done 22:53, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

I take you to burn

File:The Crazy World Of Arthur Brown - Fire totp

--    21:56, 3 February 2009 (UTC)