UnNews:New caravan invades USA
| Straight talk, from straight faces | ✪ | UnNews | ✪ | Saturday, April 20, 2024, 09:17:59 (UTC) |
| New caravan invades USA | 
|
6 February 2019
Houston, Texas, USA -- A new illegal immigration army is crossing over the border into the United States. The meanest, hardest and most desperate acting talent outside the USA is coming here to steal jobs off the Kardashians and replace the cast of General Hospital.
As predicted by President Donald Trump these criminals are arriving in futuristic vehicles, loaded up with duct tape and smelling of 'Bad Dude' aftershave. American actors dressed like soldiers have now been deployed to stop them.
Led by the thuggish Max Rockatansky (a.k.a. 'Mad Max') and South African born bald-blonde haired terrorist Imperator Furiosa, this army is claiming asylum on the grounds that 'they all need jobs in Hollywood'. Another of these criminals Rictus Erectus is a well known importer of Chinese-made Viagra and will make your children take these once they reach puberty.
I keep warning people that these bad actors want to come here but Hollywood is not listening, said the busy President Trump as he sat in front of a television eating a pile of hamburgers. My wall will keep these people out but right now they're just driving over the border and there's no one to stop them. I would, but I can't be there and discuss nuclear war..er..nuclear peace with Kim Jong-un.
A spokesperson for the caravan said President Trump had been 'watching too much on the idiot channel' and that they were not under deployed character actors and extras looking for the next show. Also..the footage shown was shot in Australia. Donald Trump responded to these allegations by claiming Australia does not exist and therefore cannot be filmed upon unlike real places like Texas and the Death Star
Sources[edit]
- staff "Another caravan on the way". CBS, February 07, 2019