Slade

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Slade wuz frum anodah palnet.

Slade was an English glam rock beat-combo who had many hit '70s songs dat wur mizspealed.

Origins[edit]

Slayed was formed in the year 2525 B.C. on the distant planet Wolverhampton, by Superman's stepdad's uncle Du-Tel. Their lead singers were axeman James Whild "Wild-Jim" Lea and the transexual Noddington "Noddy" Holder.

For a few years there, Slayed would play and bash their instruments on the villains that invaded Wolverhampton, such as some creatures from Uranus. But when the planet was in trouble, Slayed's parents put them on a meteor laced with Kryptonite (unlike Superman, Slade got their powers from Kryptonite) and jettisoned them into outer space, where they floated for thousands of years.

Arrivel on Earf and Da Peak[edit]

Weer all crazee now!

Slayed arrived on Earth in 1966. They released their first album in 1969, wherein they wore tight clothes and spelled their song titles correctly, with the intention of becoming the next Beatles. However, when this clean-cut approach failed to gain an audience, Slayed's manager Leggy Mountbatten encouraged them to changed their name to "Slade", start wearing sparkly clothes, and mispel there song titles (dey even did it wit da cover songs such as "Bourn 2 B Wile" and "Martha M'Deer"). Their first song to be misspelled wuz "'Cos I Luv U", wherein Slade stomped their feet and played de fiddle. This new approach worked, so to celebrate, the band members put on their boots and stomped on the stage at London's Albert Hall until it collapsed.

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Slade.

After firing their manager (literally, dey set 'im on fiyah), Slade took the United Kingdom by storm by releasing the hit singles "Mama Weer All Crazee Now" and "Cum On Feel the Noize", which were their first songs to go gold. Slade would also trek to the United States and perform their songs, but they didn't catch on like David Bowie or Elton John did (it may be because Slade weren't gay). Their song "Merry Xmas Everyone" is played 365 days a year in England, and sometimes on leap years.

Rockin' Against Robin[edit]

Slade's rival Robin (left) hated da way Slade wold misspell dere words. Noddy (right) can be seen here dressed in Halloween armour.

In 1999, Slade performed at Woodstock '99, but were stopped by a mob who broke stuff at the concert; one of the culprits was Boy Wonder Robin of the Teen Titans. Slade would stop the concert, put on their boots, and stomp the fire out. They were heroes, and vowed to stop Robin every time he would crash a concert.

The next time that happened was when Slade was doing a concert for the deaf. That was 2015 in Cleveland, and the Teen Titans tried to crash the concert because Puffy AmiYumi weren't there. Their absence angered the Titans, so they brought Puffy over to sing "The Night Begins to Shine" and they made the audience deaf. But when Slade played, they made everyone rock'n'roll again like they were supposed to. After that, Slade locked the Titans in a mental asylum with waffles for walls.

Catchphrases[edit]

Slade's favourite catchphrases are:

  1. "Ittay tae toyme." --> "It is not tea time."'
  2. "Yowe ulroyt?" --> "Are you alright?"
  3. "Diaphragn" --> "Fook u Robin, Boy Blunder."