Portal:Music
Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Music portal.
By far the most musical portal you will ever find. |
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To understand music, we must first understand sound. Sound is an ingredient used to make tuna casserole. (It is disputed whether sound is sweet or savory.) Sound is alive. The hills are alive with it. Just ask Julie Andrews.
The word "Music" comes from two parts: Mute and sick, basically meaning if you don't mute it you get sick. Therefore generally speaking music are created to make people sick, either feeling high or dying.
Highlighted Article
Good night, sleep tight, and don't let the Dark Lord and scores of his fiery disciples from the nether realm feast upon your immortal soul forevermore. |
Ronnie James Dio (born July 10, 1942, in Portsmouth, New Hampshire, USA), is a heavy metal vocalist, 42nd level magic user, midget rights activist, and children's author. When he's not recording, touring, or being fired from or rejoining Black Sabbath (or Rainbow), he's reviewing student applications at the Ronnie James Dio Institute of Lyrical Technology. And, when he's not doing that, he's busy penning another kiddie classic in his tireless pursuit of a Newbery Medal.
In this, the long-awaited follow-up to 1980's Children of the Sea and 1985's Rock 'N' Roll Children, Ronnie gives some of the classic children's nursery rhymes his signature treatment....
Archive | Article credit: Todd Lyons | (more...) |
Music in the News
Standish, ME, USA (USS) - Eyewitnesses say the once world famous rock band KISS has ruined another high school graduation. Parents report that students at Bonny Eagle High School were lining up to get their diplomas, when all of a sudden the rock band KISS "walked in and screwed it all up".
UnNews Audio (file info) | |
Listen to this story! | |
Problems playing this file? You might be a dope. |
Archive | Article credit: The Woodburninator | (more...) |
Featured Image
If John Lennon was the Walrus, then why is this Paulrus part of the Beatles exhibit at the Museum of Natural Science and History?
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Featured Artist
One of Miles' favourite things: Coltrane playing saxophone |
Miles Davis was a jazz musician. He played trumpet. People say he's black, but that's because they're part of the predominantly white establishment who wanted to pigeonhole him into one category. Miles doesn't like categories, and he said himself: "I'm all races at once, baby. That's what fusion was all about, don't you know?" Throughout his long career, Miles also redefined jazz humour, by being the most humourless jazz personality to ever have existed. In effect, Miles taught his proteges that it was fine to ignore the audience while playing, not to announce tunes, and even turn your back to them (to be fair, a lot of audiences turned their backs to Miles when he started playing syrupy pop-jazz in the eighties). You might want to classify Miles' humour as "black comedy"....
Archive | Article credit: Knucmo2 | (more...) |
Lyric of the Week
“No, I'm not a stranger Look! I have an umbrella!”
- ~ From the UnTunes song: You can stand under my umbrella (you can also feel my antenna)
Featured UnTunes
PLAY>MP3 |
I Like Cats (The Other White Meat)
I'm what you might call an animal lover
Horses, kangaroos and chimpazees
But dogs and birds and fish don't satisfy me
For cats they are the sweetest, you see.
Chorus:
I like cats with mustard
I like cats with chili cheese
Cat sausages, cat fricassee
Won't you try some cat chili?
I think that cats are great to eat...
Archive | Musical credit: Todd Lyons | (more...) |
Recent Articles in Music
UnReviews:Wall-E_(music_video) NSFW • American Pie • Giant Jew Band • UnTunes:Troops on the Ground • In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida • I Am the Walrus • UnTunes:Confessions of a Telemarketer • UnTunes:Ur So Phat and you don't even like food • HowTo:Write Colin Meloy Lyrics • Industrial Metal • Emo Rap • Phil Ochs • UnBooks:Great Abridged Pop Songs • UnTunes:I Will Possess Your Log
Musical Articles by Genre
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